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A Sexless marriage is a terrible experience for anyone to be going through; feeling unwanted, helpless, undeserving, and just hopeless.
But just like every other aspect of life, what doesn’t kill you can only make you stronger.
But with some knowledge and emotional wisdom as ammunition, you will become unstoppable…
So allow me to share some information to help you reverse that type of reality in your marriage if it's emotionally driven.
If it’s medical in nature, see the help of a medical professional.
Sex is the one thing that make your marriage different from other types o relationship so you should have to be stuck in the lack it.
So if you either feel that:
1. Your Spouse Rejects sex with you all the time.
2. Your Spouse Does not initiate sex enough with you OR....
3. OR You are no longer sexually attracted to your spouse.
Essentially, nothing is broken with the 2 of you physically but the vibe is just never right for one or both of you; it’s mental and I got you and you are not alone… but you need to act.
What percentage of sexless marriages end in divorce?
Studies show that 20% of marriage are sexless and you probably already know that 50% of all marriage unions end in divorce.
If I were you, I would be more scared of staying in an unhappy marriage than divorce itself; but anyway, you are not alone.
How long do sexless marriages last?
Sexless marriages can last forever especially when there are kids involved but more importantly, you should consider your marriage sexless if you have not had sex in 3 months or more.
Lack of sex should be addressed at the 2 weeks mark if there are no visible and/or medical reason clear to both of you.
Can a sexless marriage survive?
A sexless marriage can definitely survive but that doesn’t mean it’s the best way to live a quality life.
The real question is if you can reverse a sexless marriage and the answer is yes; especially if you have a good history of intimacy.
All you need is at least one of you to initiate that dance and with patience, your spouse will respond.
Sure it takes 2 to tango but there is a need for just one leader who wants to take the charge and follow these 3 steps.
1. Look in the mirror.
2. Focus on changed behavior (even if you had not offended your spouse, switching a few predictable behaviours up will make them wonder and increase attraction.)
3. Look out for rekindling signs.
4. Respond when you see signs.
Become a student of seduction; Seduction is not just sexual.
If you are the one who is no longer sexually attracted to your spouse, that’s a symptom of underlying issues which means you should focus on fixing that.
Maybe there are behaviors that your spouse puts on that turns you off; you can learn how to seduce your spouse to the way you desire him or her to behave.
For example, if she doesn’t clean after herself, your knee jerk reaction is to complain about it when you can actually seductly request that she cleans.
When she does clean once in a while, tell her how sexy she looked while cleaning.
Here is the point, use seduction to highlight when your spouse does what you like and you will naturally get more of such moments.
If you are not having enough sex, seductively highlight when you do have sex and refrain away from complaining when there is no sex for extended period of time.
What you focus on expands; negative or positive.
What happens in a marriage without intimacy?
There is a risk of at least one person wanting more intimacy and that increases the chances of infidelity and just a bad lifestyle that comes with multiple sexual partners.
If you are experiencing this, you should be concerned even if you are the less affectionate partner.
It’s even worse if you have kids because you will teach them these bad behaviors; maybe unintentionally.
Below is a question for us to address with this lesson...
“Me and my wife are separated but we don’t sleep in the same room anymore.
I tried talking to her but she wants nothing to do with me anymore.
I messed up because I was insecure.
I tried to talk to her and told her that I have changed.
Still no luck; does my marriage still have a chance.”
Enjoy the video.
Lola & Ola Abitogun of LolaAndOLA.com started dating in March of 2004. They fell in love and got married in August 2007. They are blessed with kids. After 10 years of ups and downs with a marriage that was basically non-existent for 2 full years, they’ve found real love at last, got their marriage back. They have also decided to use this medium to share how they did it so that anyone can use it to save and fix their broken marriage.